Let’s Be Feral Adults Raised by Kids!

Issue 234

Reverend Billy Talen Mar 28, 2018

Hi Rev, my 10-year-old daughter and her friends took part in the recent school walkouts for gun safety. I’m proud of her, but I worry she is growing up too fast, becoming political too soon. Can you put my mind at ease?

— Carly, East Village

Celebrate it don’t fear it. The children carry the truth. They haven’t said that Washington is impenetrable. They haven’t admitted that it’s impossible to have peace. American capitalism wants to flood our kids with childish wars, porno, ICE raids and Disney aspirational narratives. We need the children to deprogram us. The other day, during the 17-minute walkout, we floated around my daughter Lena’s school in a righteous throng of children under 12. They shouted, marched and waved “Love Not Hate” signs. Let’s be feral adults raised by kids!


Dear Reverend Billy,

I never wanted to know how badly Facebook invaded my privacy. It allows me to stay in touch with my friends and family. I even use it to keep track of you and the Stop Shopping Choir. Now that I can no longer plead ignorance, I’m pondering deleting my account. Can you convince me otherwise?

— Burt, Jersey City

We act surprised that Crackbook is such a congenial atmosphere for hate, and that gangsters have taken over. But we shouldn’t be. In our country, presidents aren’t leaders, money is. Mark Zuckerberg is one of the wealthiest executives on the planet. When he apologized recently  for losing our personal data, didn’t Mark seem sort of … listless? That’s because Z-berg isn’t a leader either, and that was dawning on him. The dark economy recalled his soul. Money made a decision.

We never asked, ‘What is this doing to us?’ There are ways to communicate that make fairness and generosity easier than hate. Why replace the sexy joy of neighborliness? When we walk in the street with our heads up, not bowed over iPhones, then we have the pleasure of unexpected bumps and swirls and laughter and sorrow and the ongoing music of real people. Just put the phone down and go back to your body. Look up!

— Rev

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Reverend Billy is an activist and political shouter, a post-religious preacher of the streets and bank lobbies. Got a question for Reverend Billy? Just email and unburden your soul.


Photo: Students in New York City take part in the March for Our Lives. Credit: mathiaswasik/Flickr.

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